Absurdities

I see things all the time that I feel are absurd. Maybe it is because there are a lot of cuckoo things in this world, or perhaps my mind is just wired to constantly be on the lookout for oddities. Either way, I will share with you the unimportant, but silly things I noticed on this particular day.

A pre-made rubber band ball for sale- Ok, for real? These are crazy easy to make and the only thing that is interesting about them is the process of creating them. If that is eliminated and then I have to pay money for it, it’s purpose is stolen and it is horrible. Buying one says, “I wanted to look like the fun girl at work by having a cute craft project on my desk, but I refuse to take the two to five minutes to do it myself.” What ever happened to creativity and the feeling of satisfaction when you make your rubber band ball bigger than the cubical next to you? Are people actually getting work done now or has the in office time been replaced with browsing Facebook? If it is the latter of the two I think pre-crafted rubber band balls should be outlawed and considered harmful to work ethic. It used to mean something when your paper clip chain reached around the entire workspace or you finally collected enough three hole punch droppings to rain confetti. I don’t want to be a part of the society that gives me the easy out for office boredom. Imagine if they just started selling puzzles pre-solved so it could get put directly on a coffee table and guests could think, “Oh wow: she’s a puzzle girl, how cool!” We live in a world of lies and illusions.

I asked the gentleman at my audition for two words to inspire me and he said, “snail droppings”- First of all, best possible answer. Second, I should reveal that I thought about it long and hard and have more to say on the subject than I originally thought possible.

  • They might be some of the smallest poops ever.
  • Tiny poops blow my mind for reasons I can’t quite put my finger on. It’s like the yuck is there but I can’t see it. But it’s still just there… but I can’t see it.
  • Snail poop could be anywhere.
  • Could a scooper that small be feasible with the right team marketing it?
  • People poop is brown, bird poop is white, what color is snail poop?
  • Since they move so slowly, if they poop, does the back part of their body linger on the turd for a while? Does it ever get stuck like cats with long butt fur or a dog who ate a long hair?

This is more than I ever realized I could ponder on such a subject, but now that those questions are out there, I’m going to want to know. A post for a later date may-haps.

When I took my dog out for a walk an extremely loud and large freight train went by 6 ft from where she was standing, no response. When a leaf blew past a few seconds later she yelped, jumped and ran in the opposite direction.- She’s not super smart, but she makes up for it by being stupid cute and crazy snuggly.

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A sign in the road that said, “CrossFit Banana coming soon” with an arrow pointing to a business- I literally have no idea. I decided to make up in my head what I want it to be and I will refuse to ever hear what it actually is. I pictured this:

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Damn I miss this show, I still know all the lyrics to the theme song. True absurd brilliance strikes so rarely.

or this…

ImageEither way, today was good.

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