I own a five minute shower timer that sticks to my bathroom wall. I am pretty sure it is making my showers longer.
Who can take a five minute shower? I know it’s possible, but are these people really clean? In five minutes, when I don’t dilly-dally at all, I can shampoo once (and I do love a good lather rinse and repeat), condition, speed wash my face with apricot scrub and clean just my torso. So if I were to do this daily I would have stinky hairy legs and underarms, sort of clean hair and some kind of scarring on my face from the rigorous scrubbing with the exfoliant.
I recently tried the approach of making it a ten minute shower timer and I just rotate the hourglass halfway through. The problem with this solution is that the technology on this thing is caveman equivalent and so you have to watch it like a hawk. I spend more time watching the sand fall than I do actually washing myself; it’s quite distracting because if I turn away there is no indicator telling me it’s done and I always miss it. At times when I’m rushing I finish in around eight minutes; at that point, because I’m crazy, I don’t want to get out before the timer runs out because as I see it, the timer is telling me I have two more minutes, so I should use them.
I bought it because it claimed that it was eco-friendly, money saving and made my day more efficient. So far it has lived up to none of these promises. It’s made of plastic and came packaged in plastic, making it not eco-friendly. I obviously didn’t save money because it cost me money to buy it in the first place and I’m sure I haven’t earned that back in my water bills. Finally, the only thing it’s done to my day is make it more stressful because now I can’t even enjoy a shower without those grains of sand mocking me from their plastic prison and reminding me that time marches on and I have places to be.
If I throw it away that would be even more wasteful… alright timer, you win this round.
Learning to be Funny 