I think I hate Valentines day. Before you go getting upset, let me explain myself; I love Valentines day (no I’m not trying to contradict myself). What I hate are the people who bitch about the holiday and act like they are badass because they are rejecting the whole concept. You are not super cool, we see right through it. What is even better are the girls who say they hate Valentines day to a guy they are into, just so he will think she is low-maintenance. Then, the next year, when they are dating… BOOM, suddenly if you aren’t lighting candles and paying for a fancy meal, you are an ass.
We have all spent at least one V-Day as a single, and I admit it makes the day harder, but do you have to whine? You know the girls I’m talking about, instead of just being adults about it they have to talk about it days or weeks in advance, to mention (in case they haven’t 1,000 times already) that they are dreading it. Well don’t you think bringing it up starting when CVS breaks out the sweet tart hearts is just making it worse? Try this instead– shutting up.
It is a Hallmark holiday, nobody gets it off from work, we don’t shop for months preparing for it, no religion is demanding that we recognize it, so if you are feeling a bit lonely this year, maybe try making plans with some friends and pretending it’s just a normal day. Don’t go twisting what I say here and get your girlfriends together for a hate fest where you all get together like a pack of rabid hyenas, gripe about dating and cry as you eat your second pint of Ben and Jerry’s. This type of display is beneath you and you know it.
As I said once already, I love this holiday. I think it is a lovely excuse to rekindle a little romance, get out of the house or just commit to spending some time with people you love, reminding them you appreciate them. One year my best friend Jamie was my Valentine, and I highly recommend her, she was wonderful. I am not asking you to like it, but when is it ever ok to make a spectacle about hating something? I really hate cantaloupe, but if someone else was eating and enjoying it you wouldn’t catch me saying, “Oh, wow, you’re eating that? I never eat that, I’m boycotting it because everyone else who likes it makes me feel left out and when I feel left out I throw a tantrum.” Are you ladies even listening to yourselves? Giving the holiday that much attention is the only thing giving it any power over you.
If you just look for the silver lining you will make the whole month of February easier for yourself. I believe that the whole day is worth looking forward to just for the discounted candy that they mark down the day after. Don’t mark the 14th on your calendar, change things up and make it a special occasion by going to the grocery on the 15th and stocking up on red and pink M&M’s (because they are pretty colors, not because they might remind you that you are alone and give you an excuse for a pity party). The day is what you make of it and from those of us who want to just enjoy it all, please keep your bitterness to yourself.
I’m sure this plea won’t spare me from the endless Facebook posts tomorrow about how you just bought a dozen roses just to cut them up and laugh in the face of romance. Yes, you win. You really showed that jerk Saint Valentine. Now next year the holiday will be cancelled because you were boycotting it. Job well done. Imagine what else you could accomplish with that kind of drive and passion.