The Dreaded SSS: Part II

So can you believe that this morning while enjoying my breakfast at my favorite diner a couple came in and sat beside each other in their booth? Did they not read my previous rant? If they are still choosing to display SSS behavior because they hadn’t read my post about it yet, that is just irresponsible. Clearly, if your actions are irritating me, you should stop them.

I managed to snap a photo of the infraction as evidence.

I know my boob is overwhelmingly prominent in this photo, but just this once try to ignore that and notice the SSS' to my left

I think the guy in this photo may have noticed me doing something funny with my phone, but whatever. I might be photographing strangers so I can later make fun of them on my blog read by my mom, but you are the creepy one, so you can’t be upset.

What is particularly interesting about this couple is that they sat beside each other when they arrived and remained that way while they ordered, then when their food came, the girl moved to the other side of the booth… I don’t know which one of the two made that decision, but I certainly wouldn’t want to be in that conversation. “Hey darling, I love sitting this close to you but now that the food is here maybe I/you should move.” Awkward.

If I believed that they had an actual system worked out where they had found a balance between remaining close and affectionate and still maintaining the appropriate amount of space while eating I could condone this, but I’m not buying it. How did the other person feel when their partner asked them to please move because the food was there? Clearly this now sends the message, “Hey, you’re great until my meal arrives, and then I really need some space to focus on that… go away.” If I were the one who had suggested SSS in the first place I would assume that the other person had never wanted it and feel uncomfortable that they had said yes when clearly they wanted me on the opposite side of the table (but I’m a cuckoo clock so I shouldn’t project on this). I think it is worse that they started next to each other and then didn’t commit to spending the entire meal this way; not that it doesn’t make sense to cuddle a little and then separate for eating, but things are never that simple.

The lesson here? If you are doing something that irritates me, stick with it because your changing of the behavior mid-behavior irritates me more than the original infraction. I don’t understand it and I can’t wrap my head around it so it must be bad. Plus, this couple’s rational decision making when the food came almost ruined my post idea for the day and I don’t like it one bit. Thank goodness I can think on my toes and roll with the punches.

2 thoughts on “The Dreaded SSS: Part II”

  1. Have you considered this possibility? The SSS sits on the same side as his/her beloved significant other, then, when the food comes he/she realizes, “Oh, I’ve seen this motherfucker eat before. I better move to the other side of the table before I lose a finger.” That’s my theory.

I'll bet you have something interesting to say about this... do tell!

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